“If ye then be risen with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ sitteth on the right hand of God. Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.”
Colossians 3:1-2 [KJV]
Meadow Argus Butterfly
November, 2014.
The girl in the mirror has untameable brown hair and a face roughened and reddened by pimples. The glasses are the crowning shame, with ultra-thick lenses that distort the features… I stare at my image and ask the same question I’ve asked many times before: Why, why, when God made me, did He add the glasses? Wasn’t I ugly enough without them?
As a teenager, I thought success was dependent on physical beauty. That’s what society, advertisements and social media told me then–and tell us today. To be popular, successful or even just happy, we must have perfect skin, specific body proportions, silken hair, this brand of clothes and that makeup product.
Yet in those messages lurks the echo of Satan telling Eve that she must do something to become a somebody (Genesis 3). The serpent still whispers that God maliciously kept something good from us, and that our physical features mean we are not worthy of being loved or achieving our goals or serving the Lord. So, we work hard to look like those we admire: that photoshopped Instagram blogger, that actress, that manager at work, or that other woman in church. But no matter how much time and effort we devote to the cause of physical perfection, the end of the rainbow keeps shifting. The anorexic, malnourished woman looks in the mirror and believes that she looks fat. Another woman neglects her appearance because she feels ugly no matter what she tries. And another girl stays home from church outreach because of a pimple outbreak.
Maybe you’ve never told anyone how much you despise your body. Perhaps you would never admit how much it niggles you when another girl has a prettier dress or a fancier hairdo. Or how hurt you felt when you knew you looked your best and no one complimented you. Yet insecurity in our physical appearance takes us quickly into the sins of covetousness, jealousy, bitterness and disobedience. It distracts us from doing God’s will and seeking “those things which are above” (Colossians 3:1). It also triggers many physical and mental health issues, including social anxiety, depression, eating disorders, heart issues and diabetes. Thoughts direct our actions and outlook: “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he,” (Proverbs 23:7) and “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life” (Proverbs 4:23). Our relationships with others are also affected. Were you so busy holding your stomach in, or hoping they wouldn’t notice that spot on your face, that you didn’t hear everything that person was saying? If we devote too much time and focus on our physical bodies, we don’t see or respond to others’ needs, and neglect to, “bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2).
So, what is the right perspective on how we Christian woman should look? Remember, we are created in the image of God (Genesis 1:27) and our physical body is “the temple of the Holy Ghost” (1 Corinthians 6:19), because the Holy Spirit lives inside each Christian. Mistreating or neglecting our bodies is therefore disrespectful to our Creator and Lord. The Bible also tells us we should look feminine (Deuteronomy 22:5), dress modestly (1 Timothy 2:9), use discretion (Proverbs 11:22), and avoid attention-seeking and status-parading styles (1 Timothy 2:9). We should not be time wasters (Ephesians 5:16), we should be content (Hebrews 13:5) and spend our money wisely (Matthew 6:19-21). But within these guiding principles there is a wonderful, individual liberty, where each woman can decide before God what suits her needs.
Yet our physical appearance should not be our focus. Our self-worth is not in what we look like, but who we are, and how God sees us. God made each one of us special: "I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well" (Psalm 139:14). God loves us with an incomparable love (Romans 8:38-39), and "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit" (Romans 8:1). God has accepted us in the beloved (Ephesians 1:6) and even made us joint-heirs with Christ (Romans 8:17)! Praise God that our identity is not physical, but spiritual!
Remember too, the warning God gave Samuel, when he looked amongst Jesse’s sons for the new king? “But the LORD said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7). Success is not about money, influence, relationships or looks: a successful Christian woman is one who prioritises what God prioritises. “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: But a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised” (Proverbs 31:30). If we women spent as much time on developing godly character as we do on attempting to achieve physical perfection, imagine just how much God could use our faithful, believing hearts for His glory!
Think about the many times demonstrations of God’s power are recorded in the Bible. Nature, disease, jealous religious leaders, and the devil himself could not stop God’s will being accomplished. So, would God’s will for my life really be halted by a few extra kilos, skin blemishes, a disability or how inadequate I feel physically? Most certainly not! Instead, God tells us what Elizabeth in the Bible told Mary, “And blessed is she that believed: for there shall be a performance of those things which were told her from the Lord” (Luke 1:45). If you are discouraged by the lie that happiness and fulfilment are dependent on your physical appearance, then be like the father in the Bible who cried, “Lord, I believe: help thou mine unbelief” (Mark 9:24).
“Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth” (Colossians 3:2). Our physical body will soon be dissolved (2 Corinthians 5:1). Instead, we should value what God values, including His Word (Psalm 19:7-11), people (John 3:16), fellowship with other Christians (Hebrews 10:24-25), prayer (1 Thess 5:17) and obedience to His will (John 14:15). Do we value what God values? Or do you spend hours straightening your hair, but not even minutes reading the Bible? Do you live in denial or shame, too afraid to admit that your focus has shifted off God and onto yourself? Maybe your life now revolves around an eating disorder, and your attempts to control your life and appearance. If that is you, go to the Lord and seek His forgiveness, and ask Him to give you the right perspective. He will answer your prayer of faith (Philippians 4:6-7), just as He answered mine when I was a teenager.
Seek help from other godly women too. Body image is an issue most of us face at some point, so tell some other mature Christian woman that you are struggling with the way you feel about your body, and ask them how they maintain the right focus. Indeed, “Two are better than one… For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). Ask them too, how to guard your heart and mind from the influence of Satan’s lies and consumerism, and to pray for you and with you.
May the Lord help each one of us to see ourselves as He sees us. May you live in victory over the physical, and “set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth” (Colossians 3:2).
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